The Writer Who Doesn't Write
An Existential Crisis On Infinite Earths
It’s been [“One Week” by Barenaked Ladies needle drop] six months since I’ve written here. Why? I just haven’t felt like it. After doing this for 15 years, it seems that I’ve lost almost all interest in writing movie reviews. I get offers for digital screeners and I turn them down constantly because I know they’ll look terrible (the streaming quality is usually lousy, or there’s a giant watermark covering the entire image), and I’ll be obligated to write a review, which is the last thing I want to spend time doing these days. It’s easier to just wait and rent the movie, that way I’m supporting the filmmakers and watching it free from the burden of having to write about it.
Anyway, right now, I’m writing a monthly Star Wars column for /Film and a Blu-ray column for Nightmare on Film Street. I don’t know if I’ll ever go back to full-time theatrical reviews. I really don’t see the point. I’ve become the writer that doesn’t write - the one who doesn’t have anything to say - the one who can’t find the words (or the motivation) to write because they know it’s a fruitless endeavor. I’m tired of screaming into the void. I hate the constant discourse. I’m burned out.
With that being said, I’m just going to drop some things here that I’ve really enjoyed lately. I hope you check them out and enjoy them too.
PSYCHO GOREMAN
Synopsis: “Siblings Mimi and Luke unwittingly resurrect an ancient alien overlord who was entombed on Earth millions of years ago after a failed attempt to destroy the universe. They nickname the evil creature Psycho Goreman (or PG for short) and use the magical amulet they discovered to force him to obey their childish whims. It isn't long before PG's reappearance draws the attention of intergalactic friends and foes from across the cosmos and a rogues' gallery of alien combatants converges in small-town suburbia to battle for the fate of the galaxy.”
Written and directed by Steven Kostanski, PSYCHO GOREMAN is this year's TURBO KID – a wildly entertaining mix of MIGHTY MORPHIN POWER RANGERS and HELLRAISER with a dash of STAR WARS space fantasy weirdness for good measure. The film is currently available to rent or own digitally on various platforms, including Amazon Prime. Check out the trailer:
GOALKEEPER
GOALKEEPER is a three-piece punk band formed by Philly natives Ryan Beebe (Singer/Bassist), Marc Juliano (Guitarist), and Cody Ritchie (Drummer), who came together to create the perfect storm of melodic hooks and hard-hitting pure pop-punk. Check out the music video for their song “Graveyard,” which really captures how I’ve been feeling lately:
TOAST OF LONDON
Created by Arthur Mathews and Matt Berry, TOAST OF LONDON is a British comedy series that stars Berry (THE IT CROWD, FX’s WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS) as Steven Toast, “an eccentric, middle-aged actor with a chequered past who spends more time dealing with his problems off stage than performing on it.”
There are three seasons (19 total episodes) on Netflix, and I would highly recommend checking this absolutely absurd series out if you need a laugh. Here’s a taste:
THE INEVITABLES
Last year, former Less Than Jake drummer Vinnie Fiorello and Westbound Train frontman Obi Fernandez created The Inevitables, a ska super-group. Fiorello and Fernandez brought together some of the genre’s greatest talents, including Matt Appleton (Reel Big Fish), Billy Kottage (The Interrupters), John DeDomenici (Jeff Rosenstock, Bomb The Music Industry!), Alex Stern, Jon Degen (Big D And The Kids Table), and Sean-Paul Pillsworth (Nightmares For A Week).
Their debut self-titled album is loaded with super fun, fast, infectious ska-punk with a few slower dub/reggae parts to change things up. While the songs all take place in a fictional universe (read the synopsis below), the songwriting is still as real and sincere as anything Vinnie has written in the past. Check out the music video for the extremely catchy “Ft. Lauderdale” here:
“The Inevitables story takes place in the not-so-distant future when Big Pharma has been able to produce a “cure for death.” Of course, there’s a big number on the price tag that reflects such a coveted item. Just like the bridge itself, it further divides the mega-wealthy from the working class. It’s about time they get a reality check that playing God has consequences, and death is inevitable.
One side of the bridge is the home of the Inevitables: an unlikely team of a punker, drug dealer, graffiti artist, a mystic bodega owner, and a middle-aged Christian couple who come together to take on the challenge that is Knight Pharmaceuticals. Dr. Tillerson Knight, owner of the massive corporation, is part of the mega-wealthy living across the bridge. As tensions rise, so do the stakes. There are only 40 days to save the world, and this is only the beginning.” - Vinnie Fiorello
30 COINS
And finally, if you have HBO MAX and a deep, abiding love for horror - especially religious horror - then boy do I have the streaming series for you! 30 COINS is a Spanish mystery-horror series created by Álex de la Iglesia (THE LAST CIRCUS, WITCHING AND BITCHING) for HBO Europe.
Synopsis: “The series follows Father Vergara (Eduard Fernández), an exorcist who is exiled by the church to Pedraza, a remote village in Spain where he hopes he is forgotten by his enemies. Vergara’s possession of a special silver coin - one of the 30 paid to Judas for his betrayal of Jesus - is at the heart of a dark conspiracy.”
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